Boracay is one of the most popular islands in the world. And for good reason… The place is stunning. But how is it living there as a single man? Here’s my official location review.
Boracay, Philippines – Women Rating 4/5
There are a lot of hot chicks on Boracay. Mostly tourists. Filipino tourists make up the majority with Korean tourists making up the other bulk of the babes. Good lord those Korean chicks are hot… I will return to Boracay one day, and I will cream pie a Korean snapper. It’s now on my bucket list. 🙂
If you’re a younger guy with some “game” then you can easily hook up with a hottie on Boracay. Every night white beach is jumping. Bars, clubs, resorts, DJs, pool parties. Holy fuck it’s fun and I love it. I like the nightlife scene on Boracay better than Angeles City. I mean how many times can you sit in a musty GoGo bar?
On white beach it’s a huge melting pot of tourists and locals all hanging out and getting fucked up. One warning here. The crowd tends to be a lot younger than anywhere else I’ve been to in the Philippines. Lot’s of young, handsome surfer dudes in their twenties with their ripped six packs exposed. This will be your competition in the clubs so you should try to get yourself together before going out there to “game.”
But have no fear my beer bellied friends. Pay for play is alive and well on Boracay. Every night starting at around 10pm the beach is lined with freelancers. All shapes and sizes from fugly to stunner. Plus a bunch of ladyboys scattered in the mix too so make sure your cock radar is on point.
There are several bars along the beach where freelancers congregate. Exit, Coco and Epic. They’re all along the beach around Station 2 so they’re not hard to find. There’s also quite a few massage parlors and freelance massage girls on WeChat.
I’ve heard people refer to Boracay as a girlfriend destination. I understand why people say that. Boracay is nothing compared to the scene in Angeles City. But you can certainly get laid one way or another. I’m sure you will have a blast if you go solo or with a date.
Boracay Cost of Living – 3/5
Boracay is reasonably priced. But accommodation can be expensive in peak season. I was there in December which is the busiest month of the year. Everything was fully booked. Hotels were expensive. I couldn’t find an apartment. The one I did find was way out in some rural Filipino area and they were asking $500 USD per month. And they were saying hurry up and decide because there’s a long line of foreigners behind me willing to pay that.
I think you’re better off going in low season. Be sure so stay away when it’s getting close to the holidays. If you want to live there long term, I would show up in low season and negotiate a long lease on a place. Finding a place in December was a challenge. I learned the hard way.
Getting to Boracay is a bit of a pain. You have to fly to the neighboring island of Malay, then take a van to the ferry. Take the ferry to Boracay. Then take a trike to your hotel. It cost me 550 pesos total to get from the airport to my hotel. It’s not far but traffic can be brutal at times on those narrow island roads.
One total rip off is the price of motorbike rentals on Boracay. They all charge a fixed price of 2,500 pesos ($50) per day for a basic, shitty motorbike. To put this into perspective, I paid 300 pesos ($6) in Angeles. The island is super small so you don’t really NEED a bike. You can get around by foot or take a trike if it’s really far. The government probably wants to keep tourists off the roads so they set the price stupid high.
But all that aside, it’s still an affordable place. Considering you’re on one of the most popular islands in the world. I saw some rentals going for as cheap as $350 per month and they were walking distance to the beach. You don’t really need transportation if you’re living near white beach because it’s all walkable. And there’s lot of fun outdoor shit to do that’s cheap like just hanging out on the beach under a shady palm tree with a case of beers. Sure beats sitting in your tiny apartment in the city.
Boracay, Philippines – Quality of Life Rating 4/5
I almost gave it a 5/5. Almost. Boracay is that fucking nice. But my only minor gripe is how small the island is. Boracay is about 7km from top to bottom. The plus side to this is most of the action is walkable. Be sure to stay somewhere on white beach. Then you have access to station 1,2,3 and D Mall. That’s where everything is happening.
The down side of the island being so small is there’s no anonymity. There’s nowhere to go but white beach. Sure there’s some quiet beaches to explore and back beach is popular for kite surfers. But every day you will find yourself at white beach along with every other resident of the island.
So you know what this means… You will run into the same people every single day. Fuck a girl and want to dodge her? Good luck with that! 😀 Want to be a playboy and juggle several “good girls?” You’re playing with fire my friend.
Funny, I talked to this one waitress and gave her my number. She never called… Ok who cares right? Well it was awkward that I ran into her literally 5 times a day. She probably thought I was stalking her. But there’s nowhere else to go! We’re all stuck within one square kilometer of every other tourist on the island.
Another slightly annoying thing is the crowds. I’m giving it a pass on this because I was there during the peak month of the peak season. But holy shit… Some evenings I couldn’t even walk down the beach it was so crowded. Unbelievable. I’m surprised the island doesn’t sink under the weight of all the people and construction going on.
I found internet to be spotty but workable. Some hotels just don’t have internet access or they only offer it in the lobby. This seems like a strange business decision in 2018. I walked away from several places that didn’t have internet access. If you need internet be sure to check your room has it before booking. I don’t do any heavy stuff online so I managed to get by on the speeds there. If you’re doing a lot of downloading / uploading and Skype calls you might want to base yourself somewhere else.
Boracay Island. Paradise Lost?
A lot of bloggers complain that Boracay is a total tourist trap that’s been destroyed by mass tourism. They certainly have a point. The tiny island got a staggering 1.7 million tourists visiting in 2016. With the tourists come all the bad stuff such as traffic, noise, pollution, price gouging, petty crime and over development.
There’s one tiny road going down the center of the island and it was bumper to bumper traffic all day with trikes, bikes and vans hauling sun burnt tourists around. It’s kind of crazy to witness it all.
But I would like to argue that Boracay is still paradise. There’s quiet areas of the island to hang out and listen to the sound of the waves. There’s mountains to climb and other islands to explore nearby. It seems odd to visit one of the most popular islands in the world and then complain that there’s people there… WTF did you expect? OK then go stay on some deserted island and rub sticks together to make a fire.
Living like Tom Hanks in Castaway is romantic for an afternoon but then I want to go back to my clean apartment where I can take a shower, pull a cold beer out of the fridge and open my laptop to check on the SMP forum. 🙂
Boracay is a place where you can enjoy island life but still have access to first world conveniences. Sometimes these two worlds clash in horribly disgusting ways but it comes with the territory I guess.
Women – 4/5
Cost of living – 3/5
Quality of Life – 4/5
Boracay, Philippines – Single Man’s Paradise Rating 11/15
I really like Boracay and I plan on going back soon. I could see myself living there part of the year. I think I would go a bit stir crazy on that tiny island if I stayed for a year straight… But with a trip out every month or so I think it could work.
The ultimate Single Man’s lifestyle would be a ballin condo in Makati and a small apartment near the beach in Boracay. Just bounce back and forth whenever you’re in the mood. Might have to make that happen. 2018 is here! Time to make our dreams come true.
Now I want to hear your thoughts. Have you been to Boracay? Please leave a comment in the forum discussion below.