The other night I stopped into a bar for a few drinks. As I ordered my first beer I noticed a pretty girl staring at me from across the bar. She was working promotion for Saigon Beer.
These beer companies hire cute Vietnamese girls and stick them in little dresses to go sell their beers at the bars. I always enjoy the eye candy. 🙂 This chick was super cute. Short, long thin legs, pretty face, lovely smile. She has big eyes and a wide mouth that sort of reminds me of “Animal” from the muppet babies. So I gave her the nick name “Slut Muppet.”
We locked eyes and we smiled at each other as she walked towards me. I figured she just wanted to sell me a beer. I wasn’t interested in drinking Saigon, but I’m always happy to chat. 🙂
“I know you from the website.” She said.
“What website is that?” I asked surprised.
She leaned in a bit. “Vietnam Cupid.” She whispered.
“Oh really? You sure it’s me?” I said looking at her face trying to remember her… Nope. I don’t remember this broad.
“Yes sure. We talked on there but we never meet.” She said. Then she told me her user name and showed me her profile pic.
“Ohhh ok… Yes I remember now…” I said.
This annoying flakey broad. We talked for a while online but she would never meet me. Well now here she was being friendly as ever.
“You look so handsome in real life. I’m very happy to meet you!” She said.
“Haha yes happy to finally meet you too. Do you have plans after work? Let’s have a drink together.” I said.
“I’m sorry I have to be home before 11:00pm… So maybe another night… Or I can just stay with you. Is it ok?” She asked.
I was a bit stunned by this. She’s asking to stay with me when I’ve known her for about 45 seconds. But hey, I’m not complaining. 😉
“Sure that’s fine.” I said trying to hold back my smile. 😀
Then she leaned in close again. “But no sex ok! Just hangout. I can not sex because I am girl Vietnam!” She said.
“Yes I understand…” I said calmly, although I was hysterically laughing on the inside.
So I sat there for a good hour drinking beers. She would come over and chat with me every few minutes until it was finally time for her to finish work.
“Let’s just go back to my place. I don’t want to drink anymore.” I said. She agreed. Then she followed me home. 🙂
Once inside my room, Slut Muppet said she wanted to take a shower. She asked for a shirt to wear to bed so I gave her one of my T shirts. She took a long shower then climbed into my bed as if it was her own.
I pulled her close and realized she was ONLY wearing my T shirt and NOTHING ELSE underneath! God I love my life. 😀
I went in for the kiss and was met with resistance. “You only want to fuck me! I’m sure!” She said as she pushed me off her.
“That’s not true. I like you. I hope to see you a lot more.” I said.
“You know. Many foreigner men come to Vietnam and fuck me. Then they leave.” She shouted.
I was shocked by this statement and it took a few seconds to process what I just heard… I mean yeah, I’m sure it’s true but why tell me about it haha. Crazy broads… I wonder if all the white cock makes them crazy in the head? Or were they crazy before being jizzed on by a dozen farangs? Lord knows…
“Well I live here and I’m not going anywhere.” I said. “Maybe you should find a man who lives here and isn’t just coming for a short holiday.”
We got comfortable and started watching a movie. It wasn’t long before I made my move again. Minutes later I was balls deep in that tight hairy snapper having a grand old time. 😀
Man this chick is super cute. Tiny. Tan skin. Cute little butt and perky boobs. She speaks pretty good English too. She talks too damn much and she’s obviously a little nutty but I was happy to make a new friend and I was hoping that I could keep her around for a while.
I shot a massive load into her tight hairy snapper and rolled off her. Then we fell asleep in each others arms. Awww….
Hello. Cream Pie. Goodbye.
In the morning I started slapping her tan little butt cheeks with my morning wood. Finally I put a little spit on my helmet and slid right in. Nothing like a cream pie for breakfast. 😉
Next time I wanted to hang out with her I asked her to come to my home. She said “NO! You only want to fuck me! If you want to meet then you take me to dinner or coffee!”
I said “OK OK… We can. Later tonight ok.” Really I was turned off by her cunty attitude but I understand she wanted to be wined and dined a bit. Fair enough. She’s not a call girl and I’m happy to go hang out with her.
Later that night she texted me and I was busy. I was balls deep in a new work project and couldn’t be bothered with entertaining Slut Muppet that evening. I apologized and said “sorry sweetheart I’m busy tonight. Can we meet another time?”
She said “No. I do not want to meet you again! You don’t respect me! I hate you!”
To which I replied “Fuck you bitch.” And then blocked her. 😀
Why do all my relationships end like this? Honestly, it’s a new year and I have no patience for the bullshit. If a chick is going to stress me out or play games then I swiftly give her the axe. Got to keep it moving these days. You know what they say. Girls are like buses. Miss one, 15 minutes later another is coming! No reason to put up with any bullshit here.
Go ahead. Try to push my buttons bitch… I will only push one button on you. BLOCK.
Another day in paradise…