I have traveled all over Thailand and settled in Bangkok for a year. I just recently moved to Phnom Penh, Cambodia. I’ve been here long enough to give you my opinions on the pros and cons of each. So here it is…

Living in Thailand vs Cambodia

Apartments

In Thailand it’s very easy to find a cheap apartment that is clean and modern. For a few dollars more you can rent an apartment in Cambodia. Everything will be broken, water will be leaking from the ceiling and there will be a strange smell.

Your neighbor will be a creepy old heroin addict from Australia who chain smokes and never wears a shirt. You will never speak or make eye contact with him.

Food

Thai food is delicious, cheap and available everywhere. Khmer food is garbage, hard to find and costs three times more.

Khmer food will make your asshole spray brown liquid at a high velocity.

The mysterious absence of Soi Dogs makes me uneasy whenever ordering any kind of meat.

Western restaurants are everywhere if you want a shitty club sandwich for $3. Every meal I’ve had in the past month has had a hair in it.

Women

Khmer girls have dark skin, they kink their hair and drill diamonds into their teeth. At first glance they look like Pattaya bar girls. Judging by their appearance I expected them to be filthy sluts but I was WRONG!

They don’t drink, they live with their family until marriage and they don’t go out at night. Plus they have dusty feet and that’s just gross.

If you are a Caucasian Male with a clean shirt you can fuck a Thai girl on the first date. Your average Thai girl is much more beautiful and stylish then your average Khmer girl.

However, most Thai girls are mindless fuck toys with zero interests outside of sleeping, eating and shopping. You will rarely meet one with any intellectual hobbies such as reading, studying a foreign language, learning an instrument or playing a sport.

I’ve been on several dates with women in Phnom Penh and it was refreshing to have an interesting conversation. These girls have dreams, goals, hobbies and interests. They are hard workers, speak multiple languages and are well informed about the world.

Going on a date in Thailand and listening to broken English for five hours is about as fun as jumping out the window and landing on your head.

Thai girls are lazy and they don’t want to work. Their main goal in life is to find a man to take care of them. So how will they spend their new free time?

By sleeping 14 hours a day, eating spicy ass papaya salad with her friends and spending your money at Siam Paragon Mall.

Thai girls are shy, but they aren’t too shy to ask you for 10,000 Baht two days after you first meet because her mom in Ubon Ratchathani needs a new air conditioner.

People

Khmer people are somewhat intelligent, hard working, outgoing and many speak good English. I met many who speak French as well. You can talk to some Thais, but you can actually have a conversation with many Khmers.

Thai people are shy around foreigners, lazy and have shit for brains.

Thai people don’t give a fuck about learning English. Not even the ones who make a living dealing with foreigners every day. Several hours of language study per week is too much effort to greatly improve their lives.

Khmer people are genuinely interested in the outside world. Thai people only care about Thailand, Thai food and Thai people.

If a Thai person traveled to Italy, the first meal they would order is Tom Yum Gung. If all they could get was pasta they would put a shit load of chili and fish sauce on it and complain that they miss Thailand.

Most Thai people have no work ethic or critical thinking skills.

If you walk into a 7-11 the size of a shoe box there will be ten employees “working” there. You will be invisible to them.

They will either be…

1. Talking amongst each other and eating.

2. Playing with their phones and eating.

3. Eating.

If a Thai person needed 100 Baht per day to live, they would work until they got that 100 baht then go lay in a hammock for the rest of the day.

Many times I have ordered a meal at a Thai restaurant and it never came… Forty minutes later I ask for my food and they laugh and say “OH SOLLY I FORGET!”

Instead of giving my order to the chef, the waitress went to the corner to play with her phone and eat. This has happened many times in the past year in Thailand and ZERO times in twenty eight years living in America.

Khmer people will stare at your white face from the moment you walk into the restaurant until the moment you leave… I’m not sure if they are admiring my handsome looks or daydreaming about hacking my white flesh to pieces with a machete.

It’s creepy, but they are always paying attention which means I get better service.

Expats

Thailand expats are young professionals, sex addicts and fat drunk Englishmen. Cambodia expats are drug addicts, losers and fat drunk Englishmen.

There are also many fat ugly white women who moved to Cambodia to save the starving children. These sexless creatures spend their free time over eating, studying Khmer language and giving the horny old men dirty looks.

Many are backpackers who ran out of cash and picked up a $10 an hour teaching job. There are no qualifications and you can live a modest lifestyle on the $1,000 per month salary while getting stoned and wasted every night.

What the World Thinks

If you visit Thailand you are a whore monger who wants to fuck ladyboys. If you are in Cambodia you are a pedophile on the run from the law.

Daily Life

In Thailand you will be invisible. Besides the Thai girls that want to date a foreigner, most people will never bother you or care to know you outside of business transactions.

You are just a walking ATM machine to the Thais. This drove me fuckin nuts after a while but now I miss it…

Sometimes it’s nice to be left alone!

In Cambodia the situation is much more desperate. The Khmer people NEED money and they will chase down every white person they see to try to squeeze a buck out of you.

Need a Tuk Tuk? Want to see the killing fields? Shooting range? Market? Need Weed? Need a Lady? Massage? Boom Boom? Little Girls? Little Boys? Everything you can have!

Tuk Tuk drivers will ask you if you need a Tuk Tuk while you are riding in a Tuk Tuk….

I have fond memories of living in Thailand and taking an evening stroll for some fresh air and exercise without being hassled by little girls selling bracelets, cripples crawling on all fours and homeless women carrying naked babies. Also, without being stopped by sketchy motorbike drivers who can’t believe you would ever walk anywhere for fun.

The Thais are more lazy and less desperate then the Khmers. They will ask if you need a Tuk Tuk but then they will go back to eating their food and talking with each other. They won’t follow you down the street.

In fact, most of the beggars and children selling shit in Bangkok are from Cambodia.

Another annoying aspect about daily life in Cambodia is getting change for your money… God forbid you pay for dinner with a $20 bill. The restaurant will have to call a meeting with all their employees to figure out what they are going to do about this major crisis.

“Ohh you don’t have small??!”

Everyone will dig into their wallets and purses to scrape together your $16 of change.

One time the ATM spit out $100 bill. I was sure I would be stuck with it until I left. There are only a few people in Cambodia with enough money to break $100 bill.

Bangkok is a vibrant, modern, cosmopolitan city with the worlds greatest nightlife.

Phnom Penh is a filthy, depressing, third world hell hole.

What do you think?

Both countries are great fun. So close to each other but so different.

I truly love South East Asia but there are certain things about daily life that drive me fuckin crazy!

You might also want to read my recent post 15 Reasons Why Cambodia Is Single Man’s Paradise.

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