Gather around Gentlemen. It’s story time here at Single Man’s Paradise. This is probably my most graphic and disgusting post yet so don’t read any further if you’re offended by talk of filthy hookers and bodily fluids flying though the air. This one easily beats my post about the Ten Dollar Blowjob from a Toothless Whore.

I’ve been in some funny situations in the past few years. Sometimes I think back about some of my nights out and just start cracking up laughing. This is one of those memories…

This story took place on Sukhumvit Soi 11 in Bangkok, Thailand. It was a typical night out in Bangkok and I was roaming all of my usual spots. Bar hopping and Tequila shots on Soi Nana, a quick pint on the balcony at The Game Sports Bar, a few cocktails at Oscar Bar, then down into Climax to see if there were any cheap hookers that caught my eye.

After a few cold Sam Miguels in Climax I needed a breath of fresh air. The place was packed, the band was loud as fuck and I was being choked with cigarette smoke. I went across the street to the filthy little cockroach infested noodle stand on the sidewalk and ordered a bowl of chicken noodles.

Meeting Thai Hookers in Bangkok, Thailand

I sat next to a couple of skanky hookers and said hello. They were wearing tiny little mini skirts showing off their tattoos. Not my type usually, but that’s exactly what I needed tonight for an hour of fun. 😉

I introduced myself and asked them where they were going. They said they were going to climax after they eat. I said, I have a better idea! Me and you go my room!

I was staying at the Grand President Hotel which was directly next door to where we were eating. It’s great staying in a convenient location in Bangkok

The sexy chick I wanted agreed to go for 1,000 baht but she insisted her friend go too… What is it with Thai girls never wanting to be alone?

“I don’t want your friend, I want YOU!” I said. Please she will go too, 1,000 each! She pleaded with me…

I said, “OK look. I want you both to suck my dick together. No condom. I will give you 1,000 and your friend 700. OK???”

They both quickly agreed and looked quite happy about our arrangement. There was another farang sitting next to us who was laughing out loud at my negotiations. I was pretty hammered at this point and probably talking too loud.

Bangkok is a wonderful place. Where else can you order sexual favors like choosing an appetizer off the menu? Simply fantastic! You will never put up with another annoying broad after you experience such easy pussy.

That’s why I recommend all men fuck a bunch of hot hookers to improve their game. Experience is experience regardless of how it’s achieved.

Fast forward five minutes and we are all finished with our shitty bowls of noodles. I tell the sweet old noodle lady with one eye “check bin krub!” Being the gentlemen I am, I pay for us three and we walk over to the Grand President Hotel. It’s the ideal location for whore mongering and club hopping in Bangkok.

Once inside I locked my valuables in the safe and took a quick shower. I laid on the bed and the hot chick came over and started blowing me. I made her keep her high heels and mini skirt on and just pulled her firm little titties out of her top. I love when girls wear sexy little outfits.

Her friend was taking a long shower and I was getting annoyed. Why is she showering??? I just want a blowjob! I started yelling for her to get out here and suck this dick! Earn that 700 baht damn it! I was worried I would blow my load before she even got involved in the action.

Finally she came out wearing nothing but a towel. She dropped it to the floor and jumped into bed fully nude to help her friend suck me off. Now this is a party! 😀

I must say, having two cute girls sucking and licking your balls and cock at the same time might be the greatest pleasure a man can experience. I highly recommend you all try it sometime. Your best option is to visit one of the blowjob bars in Bangkok and choose your two favorites for some group fun.

After a while I was starting to get a bit bored. I was pretty drunk so I could have let them blow me for hours before I popped. I decided I wanted to fuck and get this over with.

I grabbed the sexy little chick in the skirt by her hair and pushed her face down on the bed. She was laying on her stomach and I lifted up her skirt and pulled down her panties just enough to gain access to that pretty little snapper. I quickly rolled on a rubber and entered her pretty young pussy.

I never know how to handle threesomes… The other girl just laid there naked and watched me fuck her friend. It’s a bit awkward and distracting to be honest but I was having fun.

I decided to get the other friend involved for the grand finale. I told her I am going to finish on your face OK? I will raise your pay to 1,000 baht! She quickly agreed and got ready to catch whatever I launch at her. 😀

I kept pumping away on the mini skirt chick. She was still laying face down on her stomach. I laid the other girls head on her lower back. That put her pretty face right on target for my yogurt slinger.

Finally I pulled out, quickly pulled off the rubber and shot a huge disgusting load onto the naked girls face. The girl in the skirt quickly rolled out from under us to see what was going on. I was still convulsing and wringing the goo out of my wang when the mini skirt girl jumped up to get a good look at us.

Here’s When Things Went Wrong…

When she saw her friends face splattered with my spunk she started gagging… I thought this was a joke at first but then she actually puked on the floor and ran into the bathroom. I heard her heaving her guts out from behind the closed door.

I hate puking so this started to make me feel nauseous as well. At the same time it was hilarious so I was laughing out loud while trying not to vomit.

I opened the bathroom door and saw her puking into my sink. BITCH use the toilet! What the fuck!!! I don’t want to clean your chicken noodles out of the sink!

Butt naked with my sticky wang swinging in the breeze, I ran back to the bedroom to check on whore #2. She was still laying in bed with a face full of jizz. It was as if my load had some sort of paralyzing effect on her because she wasn’t moving. I felt like Spiderman who had just shot his web and trapped someone. 😀

I finally handed this sweet young lady a towel to clean up. She was laughing and smiling the whole time. Great attitude on this girl. Some girls will do what they’re told but they complain and look miserable the whole time. When you can find a fun girl who is eager to please, that’s the type you call for a repeat. I quickly took down her Line ID while she was cleaning my goo off her eye lashes.

Ten minutes later they were out the door and on the dance floor at Climax. I fell asleep with an empty ball bag and a funny memory. $60 well spent, despite having to mop the floor. 😀

Lessons Learned

Bangkok is awesome! Everyone already knows that right? Bangkok is my favorite city in the world. If you want to party like a rock star, monger like a manic or just live a comfortable life dating sexy Thai college girls, Bangkok is the place to be!

Mongering is fun. I go through phases with women. Some months I just want to date good girls and have a meaningful relationship. Then some months I get tired of that bullshit and just want to run wild around Nana Plaza. The bottom line is, mongering is good for you in small doses.

Men need sex. Bangkok is a place where you have easy access to whatever fantasy or fetish you are into. Every man should experience their wildest fantasies and not just dream about it while spanking it to porn. Is it time to Plan Your Trip To Thailand?

If you embark on an epic journey to Single Man’s Paradise you will find yourself in some wild situations. Some good, some bad, some strange and hilarious. I wouldn’t change a thing! It’s all part of the adventure! 😀